It’s Great To Reach For The Stars But You Might Only Get As Far As The Moon . . . That’s OK

reaching_for_the_stars_by_kaotickellHave you ever experienced that love donates like an exploding star? It can disappear into the cosmos just as quickly but love that grows slowly may never burn quite as brightly as a supernova, but it may deliver more energy over the long run. Remember: It only takes a little spark to start a raging forest fire.

Perfection is a wonderful goal. Always settling for second-best can lead to a lifetime of disappointment. But sense nobody is perfect, you could spend a lifetime searching and wind up getting nowhere. So it makes since to find a partner who may no be perfect or the one yo pictured as your “soul mate,” but there is definitely some chemical reaction going on between you or you wouldn’t be together. Could it bubble and boil more strongly? Perhaps! Would that chemical reaction be stronger with someone else? Maybe? But don’t be too quick to abandon a relationship because your partner doesn’t fit the definition of “soul mate.” 

The French call that feeling of instantaneous love le coup de foundre, the lightning bolt. Luckily, the odds of being hit by a real lightening bolt are small. Maybe, the odds of being hit by le coup de foundre are also small, but at least it’s not the only way to find true love. We live in a world of instant gratification there is no denying that because of the world of instant gratification many end up feeling less satisfied and blinded to love that slowly builds up. That’s because their love bucket it so low. When someone’s love bucket is low they often end up being less satisfied because a relationship takes some work on the parts of both people. That means that both people have to come together in agreement and actually work at having or maintaining a relationship.

Think of it this way fast food doesn’t compare to a meal that takes hours to prepare. Ready-to-wear clothes never fit as well as those that are hand tailored. So just because a relationship take some work on the parts of both people to come together it doesn’t mean that is filled with any less passion than one that sparked at a first glance. In the long run , it may actually provide a lot more heat than a relationship that starts off quickly but peters out just as fast as it began.

 

 

 

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Love Shouldn’t Be Blue

Head GamesWhat’s the color of your love? Is it flaming hot red or is sad blue?  Even flaming hot red Love “Wilts” without smiles, it drops under the weight of tears. It grows pale when it’s kept indoors. Storms of anger can melt away as quickly as they boil up. Feelings of sadness or anguish can be longer lasting. And injured heart can do as much damage to emotions as ethereal as love, as an outraged spleen can do to all your emotions.

If you’re drowning under waves of blue, you must learn how to swim for shore.Depression puts your whole life in shadows and prevents you from letting your love shine through to the people you want the most to see it. It’s okay to feel sad once in a while. It’s part of the human condition. The death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, the onset of a physical illness, even the loss of a valued object can make you cry and feel miserable for a time.

But eventually you do get over these blue moments. When nothing sets off your sadness and instead it’s a constant shadow, then it gets another name :depression. If you can’t shake off the blues by yourself, seek professional help. Remember, it’s not just your life that is miserable, your constant flow of river of tears could also be drowning you relationship. And if your partner is the one who’s always down, don’t just allow yourselves to drift apart because of it. If he or she can’t get help, then do whatever it takes to make certain they get the help they need.Do it for them, because you love them, but also do it for the two of you.

Tip: While anger boils up quickly, makes itself noticed, and then evaporates, depression sneaks in on little feet and makes itself comfort and won’t leave. Because of its quiet nature, it’s easy to overlook. If you or your loved one, are acting differently, especially if you’re sleeping a lot more than usual, then don’t hesitate to go to a doctor. It’s better to call in a false alarm than to let depression do even more damage because it’s ignored. 

There Will Be No Lifetime Exactly Like This One

Which WayThere will be no love, no sweetheart, exactly like this one the man who pronounces your name in just such a way, with his beautiful voice, the man who brings flowers, whose words move your heart so tremblingly softly, whose arms holds you this way and they way, embracing, consoling, protecting: the woman whose fragrance enchants you, whose head on your chest when you sleep is the sweet weight of bliss, whose kisses are blessings, whose laughter is sunlight, whose smile is pure grace.

There will be no lifetime exactly like this one, no other, not ever again, not this birth, not this particular story, this mother and father, these houses and walls, these strangers and friends . Oh! And how you are moved by it all, with such beauty, touching each other, dancing, stepping, curtsying, bowing across all the stages, filling the rooms of your lives with this joy,  this sweet love. There will be no other way to live this life, only the way you have chosen to live it and with whom moment to moment. This moment , this day, this relationship, this life, are all unique, exquisite, unrepeatable. Like every  moment as if you, indelibly, knew this.

Celebrate Your Specialness

PrettyYou complete me. Many people believe that when  Mr. Right or Mrs. Right comes along then they will be a complete human being. All too many of us consider love to be the miracle by which, we  will become complete human beings. This is the fixer-upper notion of love, the idea that we’re not all right as we are but we could  be  if we could  just find that one person to be loved by,  then that would prove we’re OK.  Love begets love.

If you don’t think well of your self, enjoying and valuing the person that you are, and have an understanding that self-knowledge is a lifelong personnel enterprise. It means that you appreciated yourself at least as much as you value your honey, that you know he or she is as blessed in love as you believe you are. It means you measure your strengths and weaknesses neither with the abuse of self-depreciation nor the insanity of egomania, but with genuineness, with accuracy. Loving  yourself is recognizing your gifts and talents and putting them to good use, acknowledging your flaws and forgiving yourself for them. Loving yourself is reaching for more, for the best in you.

So often people put up with shabby treatment in love because they don’t believe they deserve better. But self-love is always the model for the love you may reasonably expect, the true measure of the love you will give and get. Your heart can only hold as much love as you believe it can. So treat yourself better, believe you deserve to be treated well, and you will get treated ever more wonderfully in love. Love yourself. If you have not been treated kindly throughout your life or are trying to overcome a trauma from the past do yourself a favor and seek professional help and that should put you on a journey to loving yourself. You can exchange those ashes for beauty. Remember God is love.

Candlelight Nurtures Romance

 Romance By CandlelightTwo hearts beat stronger as they gaze into the soft luminescence flames of candles.  The soft luminescence encourages loving gazes, whispered words, delicate touches, and sensual strings. Candles not only provide light, but also shadows that move along the walls and trigger your imagination. When bathed in candlelight, you and your sweetheart can relax and express yourselves in a way words cannot duplicate.

 When cave men and women walked the Earth, the dark was something to be feared. They tamed fire and the night  pushed them outside their caves. Huddling around the fire, they found safety, warmth and pleasure. Today we have little contact with fire. Our homes light up and our food can be cooked without any flames at all. Yet our ancient love of fire remains.  Instinctively we are drawn to a flame, not only for its wavering beauty but because when our sweetheart are basking in the firelight’s soft, warm glow emits a special effect. That’s why two hearts outlined by the radiance of a flame beat just a little faster.

Fireplaces are great place for reconnecting to the crackle and pop of a raging blaze. But a flame can also be cradled in a much smaller frame: a candle. Candles work best in groupings, which can be arranged to provide the utmost in atmosphere. They can be gathered together or spread around the room. It’s not really important how you arrange them, but the process itself  will put you a romantic mood. When you’re done, you and your sweetheart can settle into your private cave constructed of darkness and light.

Romace Can Be Imperfectly Perfect

HelloRomance speaks volumes in the form of focusing your total attention on your sweetheart, for a few minutes or hours, even when there’s something else you’d rather be doing.

For love to grow, the two of you need to communicate. The sounds, smells, sights, and touches that are the main ingredients of your love. They must somehow be pressed back and forth between the two of you and romance is the medium for this transferal.

Love that is accompanied by the words “I’m sorry” will never be rejected as long as they know you mean it. Love in the form of focusing your total attention on her for a few minutes or a few hours, even when there’s something else you’d rather be doing, will speak volumes.

Romance needs to be nestled in your cocoon of romance. Sometimes it’s easy to become confused about romance and think it can be bought. While money does help to create atmosphere, romance it’s self doesn’t have a price tag attached to it, nor is it required to be wrapped in a box from Tiffany’s.

It just needs to be a significant part of you: a thought, a block of time, your sympathetic ear, your warm arms holding her, the touch of you rubbing her back, the flutter of your kiss. Your smile, a hug from you, a sweet hello, you telling her that she looks pretty today, giving her a gift without any other motive other than to let her know that you are thinking about her and of course making a dinner date for just the two of you and don’t forget every girl needs a girls night out so another way to say I love you is to baby sit so she can have some time to herself.

 

Speak Kind Words To Your Sweetheart

Love is like a gardenWords can build your sweetheart up or tear them down so it seems that this saying most that most of us grew up hearing from our parents and school teachers was right,” If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” Isn’t it amazing how a simply statement like that is so true?

Even small children learn that language is a very powerful instrument and what they utter gets results. When a baby says, Da, Da  or Ma, Ma for the first that little baby receives some awesome responses and that experience becomes forever ingrained in their parents hearts.

Statements like “You’re Brilliant” or “I Just Love The Way Your Mind Works” and this one, “You Are So Intelligent” spoken to your sweetheart can over time change how your sweetheart sees themselves. If your sweetheart was endlessly yelled at or told they were stupid or maybe they were overly criticized as a child they may not know just how brilliant they are and just how much you love and adore them.

It’s never to late to start telling your sweetheart just how wonderful they are and how much they mean to you. After all you’re no dummy and you have chosen them to be your sweetie . . .  so that right there makes them pretty awesome. Doesn’t it?

The more you tell them in all sincerity something  inside of them will start to shift and they will begin to believe you and in them selves and that they aren’t stupid. The more you speak kind and true words into them the more they will become able to believe you and in them selves. You will start to notice that other people will start saying similar things to them and in time the words will change entirely how your sweetheart feels about themselves.

Stop and celebrate your sweethearts intuitive genius and the extraordinary functions of their minds after all they were smart enough to choose to love you that choice right there makes them genius. Doesn’t it? One form of emotional healing comes from the precise use of language and words that you speak to your sweetheart and words that they speak to you. What you say, and what you hear them say, has the power to sculpt how you love and respond to your sweetheart.

Consider the words you utter to your sweetheart as words of great gifts of love and in the midst, marshal this powerful influence and use it to bring life, encouragement, and healing to the one you most adore. Negative words may have shaped your sweethearts early consciousness and their perception of themselves but you see the opposite in them. They may see themselves as, “Ugly” and you see them as,” Beautiful” don’t just tell them one or two times or when your feeling amours tell them often.

Remember silence is like a vacuüm, drawing in all thoughts that go by, so protect your sweethearts ears and be aware what your words imply. Choose your words carefully; think about what you say. Don’t fill the void with just anything, squawking like a jay. Make sure your emotions aren’t trapped elsewhere. Give what you say, meaning; speak and act with care. Then love will sound like a trumpet and to your words impart the clarity of romance as you speak to your sweetheart.