Discover Your Loving Self

Lovely LadyBegin your journey toward love and truth today by searching for the love inside you that is longing to be expressed and find the words to speak it. Seek the truth that stands in your midst, that is carried , embodied, and spoken by all your strangers and friends.

Live the higher truth as you know it, as it is revealed to you through art, literature, in music, in nature, and in your dreams. Receive the truth that surrounds you, for the truth is everywhere. Surrender yourself to the truth, for love and truth is the ultimate light. Align yourself with truth and love because to live your life in truth and love is to live in perfect freedom.

Love gives meaning to our relationships and our relationships give meaning to our love. There is nothing purer than the truth. If stands inviolate on its own merit, searing through falsehood and equivocation, shining brilliant as the spiritual totem around which our whole lives are organized. 

Truth is a journey toward itself. To live in truth is to be aware that , as your context changes, so will your view of truth and range of the truth that your heart and soul can contain. Your truth may not be now what is once was or what it will be in the future, but it is your duty to live and speak your truth of the moment and to be willing to change it, should some larger truth be revealed.

In relationships, we begin with telling our stories, our needs, our hopes, and our dreams. We begin with sharing small truths and what seems to be true in the moment for us and speak them in love, to the people we love. Then we move on to the many and varied vicissitudes of our ever unfolding personal selves, toward the truth that embraces love.

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Speak Kind Words To Your Sweetheart

Love is like a gardenWords can build your sweetheart up or tear them down so it seems that this saying most that most of us grew up hearing from our parents and school teachers was right,” If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” Isn’t it amazing how a simply statement like that is so true?

Even small children learn that language is a very powerful instrument and what they utter gets results. When a baby says, Da, Da  or Ma, Ma for the first that little baby receives some awesome responses and that experience becomes forever ingrained in their parents hearts.

Statements like “You’re Brilliant” or “I Just Love The Way Your Mind Works” and this one, “You Are So Intelligent” spoken to your sweetheart can over time change how your sweetheart sees themselves. If your sweetheart was endlessly yelled at or told they were stupid or maybe they were overly criticized as a child they may not know just how brilliant they are and just how much you love and adore them.

It’s never to late to start telling your sweetheart just how wonderful they are and how much they mean to you. After all you’re no dummy and you have chosen them to be your sweetie . . .  so that right there makes them pretty awesome. Doesn’t it?

The more you tell them in all sincerity something  inside of them will start to shift and they will begin to believe you and in them selves and that they aren’t stupid. The more you speak kind and true words into them the more they will become able to believe you and in them selves. You will start to notice that other people will start saying similar things to them and in time the words will change entirely how your sweetheart feels about themselves.

Stop and celebrate your sweethearts intuitive genius and the extraordinary functions of their minds after all they were smart enough to choose to love you that choice right there makes them genius. Doesn’t it? One form of emotional healing comes from the precise use of language and words that you speak to your sweetheart and words that they speak to you. What you say, and what you hear them say, has the power to sculpt how you love and respond to your sweetheart.

Consider the words you utter to your sweetheart as words of great gifts of love and in the midst, marshal this powerful influence and use it to bring life, encouragement, and healing to the one you most adore. Negative words may have shaped your sweethearts early consciousness and their perception of themselves but you see the opposite in them. They may see themselves as, “Ugly” and you see them as,” Beautiful” don’t just tell them one or two times or when your feeling amours tell them often.

Remember silence is like a vacuüm, drawing in all thoughts that go by, so protect your sweethearts ears and be aware what your words imply. Choose your words carefully; think about what you say. Don’t fill the void with just anything, squawking like a jay. Make sure your emotions aren’t trapped elsewhere. Give what you say, meaning; speak and act with care. Then love will sound like a trumpet and to your words impart the clarity of romance as you speak to your sweetheart.

Ten Big Things To Remeber During The Ups and Downs Of Life . . .

be-yourself-When life puts a mountain in your way don’t forget you’ve faced mountains before. Don’t be afraid. You’re strong. Just start climbing. Imagine yourself reaching your goal. Changing your attitude can free you or keep you bound. You have what it takes . You have your spirit, mind and body. You have wisdom to know how to compensate. Cry is you want. Kick and scream. It’s okay. Get it out of your system then check your worries at the gate. Remember  . . . it’s just another mountain. You’ve climbed mountains before, and you will climb this one. You can do it. Absolutely!

Ten Things to Remember During The Ups and Downs After Calling Your Best Friend . . .

  1. Your life is a gift to you. Appreciate this gift with all your heart.
  2. Know that God is always with you. Pray to Him often, Listen to His guidance, and don’t forget to thank Him for your blessings.
  3. Respect yourself and make wise choices about your life.
  4. A balanced life is based on give and take. Give joyfully out of your own need, and you will draw whatever you need to you.
  5. You’re thoughts, words, and actions paint the total picture of who you are. Be good as your word, and be good.
  6. Treat others as you want to be treated, no matter how they’ve treated you . . .
  7. Don’t judge others. Don’t try to change others especially your sister or your best friend; it won’t work. You’ll have enough trouble changing yourself.
  8. When you’re down, get up and try again. Whatever you’re going through will look different on another day.
  9. If you wrong someone, ask forgiveness, and when someone wrongs you, be quick to forgive.
  10. Choose to love others, for when you show love, you are making a positive difference and don’t forget to call your best friend.

I hope you will look at all your good qualities and realize how important you are to those who love you. Start reflecting on your own attitudes, your accomplishments, and all the things that make you who you are. I know you will find ways to make the difficult times easier, your cares lighter, and the days brighter. I pray that revelations and secrets will unfold for you to make a difference as you tap into that source of strength I know is within you, that place where hope and courage lives  and new dreams are born.  I hope you will connect with the kind of faith that helps you to reach your desired goals.

~Granny In Training~

“Begin Your Journey Toward Truth Today”

plant your own gardenTruth is a journey toward it’s self and it includes an empathetic moment when we surrender, expressing our own urgent truths in order to be with another during the unfolding of his, or her truths. To live the truth is to be aware that, as your context changes, so will your view of the truth and the range of the truth that your heart and soul can contain.

Your truth may not be now what it once was or what it will be in the future; but it is your duty to live and speak your truth of the moment and to be willing to change it, should some larger truth be revealed to you.Finding Joy

In relationships we begin with the small truths that  are true at the moment for us and speak them, in love, to the persons we love.Happy Couple We start with our stories, our needs, our hope, and our dreams, then move on, through the many and varied vicissitudes of our ever-unfolding personal selves, toward the truth that embraces us all.

For the ultimate truth is immense; it swallows up all other truths, our little individual truths, the contradictions we all are living, and even the bigger truths of paradox and dogma, of principles and rules.Right Or Wrong

There is nothing purer than the truth, it stands inviolate on its own merit, searing through falsehood and equivocation, shining brilliant as the spiritual totem around which our whole lives are organized.

The truth is indivisible, stunning, eternal, the alpha and the omega of our mortal human existence. Nothing less than the truth can ever pass for it. Begin your journey toward truth today.

 Search for the truth inside you that is longing to be expressed and find the words to speak it. See the truth that stands in your midst, that is carried , embodied, and spoken by all your strangers and friends.Your Journey Is Your Own

Live the higher truth as you know it, as it is revealed to you, through art, in music, in literature, in nature, and in God given dreams. Receive the truth that surrounds you, for truth is the ultimate light. Align yourself with the truth, for to live your life in truth is to live in perfect freedom.God Moments Begin your journey today!

“When Mama Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy!”

Many couples are putting their children at the center of the family. This doesn’t sound like a bad thing, after all, aren’t your grandchildren the apple of your eye too? But when parents put their children ahead of  their own needs, ahead of their marriage, it may seem child friendly, but it can lead to complications.

When children are the absolute center of the family, they can grow up without boundaries. This can lead to demanding, entitled kids. Who become demanding, entitled adults. You might have a friend or two who are demanding and they can be difficult to get along with. Can’t they? 

 No one wants their children or grandchildren to turn out to be demanding. Do they? Some acting out might be all right for a child, but future bosses, spouses and friends will probably not be so tolerant. Will they? Furthermore, being the center of the family is too much pressure for most childrenChildren cannot fulfill all their parents‘ emotional needs and it’s not fair to expect them to. Children in this position often feel they need to parent their parents and that’s not their job. Actually, it’s your job to be there for your children when they are parents.

Remind them to make time for themselves, their spouses and friends if you want to be helpful offer to babysit so they can have a date night or weekend getaway, and you’ll get to spend extra time with your grandchildren.  Bob and Jane being the wise parents and grandparents that they are, offered to babysit their grandchildren while Jim and  Lynn went out on the town.  As Lynn was leaving, she told her children to listen to Nana and Pops and then gave them a kiss on the cheek and thanked her parents.

Well, Bob winked at Lynn while reminding her of this old saying,”When Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!” Bob’s point was that couples need to spend time together just the two of  them and keep the romance going.  Now Jim plans romantic surprise date nights at least twice a month and all Lynn has to do is show up . Jim and Lynn are feeling reconnected and Nana and Pops are “Happy Grands.” Jim agrees with Bob “When Mama Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy!

The Mother In Law Relationship Is Complicated

The conflicts between mother-in-laws and daughter-in-laws is still going on it has raged throughout all of history. Nearly 2000 B.C. Rebekah complained to her husband, Isaac, that her daughters-in-law were making her life so miserable that she would rather not even be alive. Read Genesis 27:46).

Today, some 4,000 years later, women are still complaining to their husbands about these women! Mother-in-laws are still wondering why out of all the human relationships, the one between them and their daughter-in-laws is the most complicated? Second only to step relationships of course.

There is a built-in-conflict before the relationship even begins: two radically different views of the same man. The daughter in law will see him first as a man; while the mother in law will always see him first as her child.The mother in law comes into the relationship lugging a suitcase bulging with memories. From the sweetness of babyhood through the tyranny of the teen years into adulthood, these memories have indelibly imprinted her heart. She enters into this life phase acutely aware of a door closing in her life as a mother.

The daughter in law comes waltzing in with a suite case empty of everything but confidence and anticipation. She’s eager to swing open the new door and march in and there lies the basis for struggle. Both the mother in law and the daughter in law are naturally territorial when it comes to their family. Standing in the middle of  these two overlapping territories is a man who is the son of one and husband to the other. It’s in everyone’s interest for the son to step out of the overlapping territory and fully into his wife’s territory and the sooner he does this the better.

The parental relationship is secondary to the spousal relationship, yet the bond between a mother and her child is visceral. The phase “bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh” refers to husband and wife, yet there is little doubt a mother holding her child in her arms feels more “bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh” toward her child than she does toward her husband. Again, the basis for conflict between a man’s mother and his wife.

This motherly feeling of “bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh” had been the source of much marital conflict: a mother consciously or unconsciously placing her child before her husband, magnifying her connection to their child. Even the court system typically give more value to the mother-child relationship.

The undeniable connection can easily cause a mother to overstep her territory and interfere with the process of her adult son transferring thus-far primary relationship, the one he has with her  to the one needs to form with his wife. If you are a mother of a son, you fully understand this tendency, because there is a powerful bond between mother and son. A man’s first significant relationship is with his mother. That bond, forged at birth, leaves a permanent imprint on both mother and son. Even if the relationship is broken, it continues to significantly impact both lives. This powerful attachment between mother and son needs to be and must be reassigned when the son introduces another woman into the picture.

Here is a scenario to consider “Suppose your son, yourself and your daughter in law were in a boat together. If the boat capsized and you and your daughter in law were both drowning, who should he save?  You might be saying to yourself, ” A man can always get another wife, but he has only one mother.”  or a daughter in law might be thinking to herself,” well his mother is old any way.” Now, now is that anyway to be thinking?

As a mother you should want your son to have a strong and healthy relationship with his wife. A mother who wants to maintain a close relationship with her son, who truly has his best interests in mind, must willingly step back and fully acknowledge and respect the relationship he is forming with his wife.

Whether she likes the woman or not. There is nothing to be gained, and much to be lost, by allowing competition to into the in law relationship. While the mother may not view her behavior as being competitive, the truth is that anything she does to maintain her status as the first woman,” whether consciously or unconsciously, will be viewed by the daughter in law as competition.

 Sometimes completely innocent behavior on the mother’s part will be wrongly interpreted this way. Knowing, this the wise mother will refuse to take offense and will carefully watch her behavior until he daughter-in-law is secure in her position. 

 Five years ago my friend Jane’s son  David married a terrific gal named Liz and on the day of their wedding Jane’s mother in law shared some advice with Jane. She said, that she chose to forget everything she had ever knew about her son and let her daughter in law discover him for herself. As any mother can image that is not easy to do. Is it? Jane and her mother in law are truly friends and enjoy each others company.

 Jane, decided  she wanted to have the same kind of relationship with her daughter in law so she decided to take her mother in laws advice and chose to forget everything she ever knew about her son David and let Liz discover him for herself.” It was a choice that has richly rewarded Jane over and over and over again. She said ,she loves how excited Liz gets when she learns something knew about David and Jane enjoys Liz’s excitement,friendship plus she completely understands why her son loves his wife as much as he does.

A successful relationship with your in-law does not necessarily mean you become best friends. It doesn’t necessarily mean enjoying lunch dates or shopping together like Jane and Liz do. Success is simply determining to live peaceably with her by any means. Success is getting up every morning and determining to leave the past in the past. Whatever your history is with your in-law find a way to make admins and move on.

Success is recognizing that at the center of your conflict is a man you both love, children you both love, and finding a way to make room for each of you to benefit from and express that shared love.
Success is consistently acting in love and letting go of the negative emotions you may have toward your in-law,start refusing to let those emotions color the quality of your life for one more minute.

Your love is like a garden, and unless you tend to it, you’ll never reap the full rewards that love can bring.

 

What’s On Your Wish List?

How many times have you started a sentence with the words “In my lifetime, I want to…”?

Perhaps what you wanted was something grand, like winning a medal for bravery. Maybe it was something modest, even mundane like a wish to clean out your car or to climb a tree.

Maybe you wished for something fantastic like having your own cooking show on HGTV, for example. Or something utterly practical, like making a budget and sticking to it.

Your wish might have taken you to the other side of the world or as far away as the moon, or it might have meant just a walk around the corner. Maybe you wished to do something generous, or something just for you.

What happened to all those wishes? Where did they go? Wishing is good for us. Daydreams, fantasies, castles in the air, and aspirations all drive us forward, impel us to make things happen. They also tell us a lot about ourselves. Our wishes came straight from our core, and they are loaded with vital information about who we are and who we can become.

Keeping track of our wishes helps us tap into the energy that propels us to go after our happiness. That’s what a wish list can do for you. It is to serve as a wellspring of ideas for things to do, have, see, taste, experience, achieve, give, be, learn, do for others, or try just once.

Complete this sentence: “In this lifetime, I want to …” Your collection should range from small, easily realizable goals to grandiose pipe dreams and everything in between. It works for ages 10 to 100. In fact wish lists looks like our own hopes and dreams.

Your wish list is not meant to be solely revelation it is meant to be used as your very personal “to do list for life.” Carry your wish list with you and when your creative daydreaming starts, scribble your own wishes on the blank lines. Check off or underline those wishes you want for yourself.

When you’ve achieved a wish, celebrate the fact by checking it off with a big red X next to it. As years go by and the wish list’s pages become dog-eared and yellow, you will have accumulated a profile of your changing view of happiness, your own evolving values, and your own fulfillment, Not a bad thing to have.

Here is a short list of wishes that might help you start your own list.

  • Try everything that is good once.
  • Witness an event that turns out to be a major historical occurrence.
  • Have a positive effect on people
  • Smell Florida’s night-blooming jasmine.
  • Be surprised by your children.
  • Live in a California beach house with the ocean for your front yard.
  • Attend a vintage motorcycle rally.
  • Coin a phrase.
  • Sing a song that your niece writes.
  • Dance at your grandson’s wedding.
  • Take underwater photographs.
  • Write the lyrics to a passionate love song for your husband / wife.

Summer at a villa in Tuscany. Lean to draw. Skinny-dip under a waterfall. Volunteer at the local soup kitchen. See a mountain gorilla in the wild. Meet your favorite motivational speaker. Work for someone you’ve always admired. Write a love poem.  Start your own blog. Watch the sun set over your favorite locations. Solve a mystery. Take the road less traveled. Your wish list is calling you, now get out there and start living.